Mom burnout results from constantly juggling work, life, and childcare, leading to feeling depleted (also known as depleted mother syndrome). Emotional and physical exhaustion can fuel anxiety and depression, which leads to a downward spiral. Instead of burning out, I’m using the concept of “finding pockets of time” —5 minutes here, 10 minutes there to journal and write. How else can we find more time in our day for ourselves? (4.5.25.)

Motherhood, burnout and depleted mother syndrome

More than half of parents report feeling completely depleted. For many moms, the constant juggling of work, childcare, home duties, and personal expectations can lead to emotional and physical exhaustion.

This state is often called “maternal burnout” or “depleted mother syndrome,” and can leave you feeling anxious, down, and far from the mom you want to be.

With days that start early and rarely stop, it’s no wonder so many women feel overwhelmed. You’re not alone in this, and feeling this way doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you’re human, doing your best in a role that asks for so much.

Grabbing time

Cramming work, baby, and life into each day is a lot, so I’m learning to find small moments for myself, like 3 minutes of meditation or a quick journal entry, as essential.

They’re no longer last on the list, as if I put my oxygen mask on first, I’ll have the energy to put on my baby’s. There’s no point running on empty (fuelled on coffee and resentment).

Grabbing time is a concept Julia Cameron talks about in The Artist’s Way. It’s about not waiting for the perfect time, but using what time you do have to start something, whether it’s 1 or 10 minutes. It’s prioritising self-care (writing, exercising, relaxing, etc.) and tasks you tend to procrastinate on (life admin, finances, appointment setting).

The morning pages and “the dash to the page”

Her practice of the morning pages (writing in a stream of consciousness way - “Just the dash to the page”) is a way of writing that doesn’t second-guess or wait for a perfect time. It’s a practice, a way of processing. This can be applied to finding pockets of time to do things in a quick, automatic way, without expecting it to be perfect.

Automatically doing things dismantles perfectionism. Finding 20 minutes to write on the train, 2 minutes in a queue, 1 minute while waiting for your kettle to boil is time grabbed or a pocket of time.

Finding “pockets of time”

Creating “pockets of time” to write, stretch, breathe, dream, or simply rest allows you to feel more like you. It’s not about doing more—it’s about being able to do the things that uplift and enliven you. Even the smallest space can be a soft place to land.

For me, morning pages have been a ritual as I can express anxieties, fears and worries on the page, rather than let pressure build up in my head.

Microjoys and energy boosters

The concept of microjoys was introduced by Cyndie Spiegel in her book Microjoys: Finding Hope (Especially) When Life Is Not Okay. She describes microjoys as small, accessible moments of joy—like a kind gesture, a familiar scent, or a cherished memory—that offer comfort and hope, especially during difficult times.

These moments don't erase pain but provide brief respites that help us move forward. Spiegel practised microjoys when she experienced profound personal loss, discovering that finding these fleeting joys helped her navigate grief and hardship.

I often believe I have to have a big amount of time stretching out - 1 hour to write - but the truth is, these 5 minute, 10 minutes, 20 minute gaps are often the times that force me to focus and get as much done as possible.

It’s a mindset shift that can boost energy and mood (instead of thinking, “I can’t write because I don’t have a full hour of time today, so I might as well forget it”).

Energy booster ideas:

Mini gratitude check-in: name 3 things you're thankful for right now to reframe your focus
Fresh air: step out for fresh air in a space that can reset your energy
Affirmations: Repeat, “I have enough time and energy for this moment”
Smile: Just smile in general, it’s a natural face lift
Drink water: Intentionally feel the water go down your throat

Radical acceptance and finding “pockets of time”

I’ve come to radically accept this new, slower season of life—moving at the pace of my toddler as he learns each step with growing confidence.

Being a mother drastically changes how you view time. Rather than automatically say to myself, “I don’t have time,” I’m starting to use “I have this pocket of time right now so I’ll do this one thing.”

I miss the freedom of uninterrupted space and time for myself. I’m not going to pretend otherwise. I guess it’s finding opportunities, glimmers, and pocket of time that do work for ourselves.

I’ve learned that nothing just happens—I have to use the time I do have to keep growing. Even in the mess, I can create pockets of time by asking, “What can I do now?” It doesn’t have to be perfect—writing at a retreat sounds ideal, but for now, it’s tapping into my Notes app while queuing for milk, and that’s ok.

Sources

Cameron, J. (2002). The Artist's Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity (10th Anniversary ed.). Penguin Publishing Group.

Ohio State University Wexner Medical Center. (2024, May 8). Pressure to be 'perfect' causing burnout for parents, mental health concerns for their children. ScienceDaily. https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2024/05/240508093726.htm

Spiegel, C. (2023). Microjoys: Finding Hope (Especially) When Life Is Not Okay. Penguin Life.

Mom burnout: Finding pockets of time for yourself