Mom rage: channeling anger with Core Energetics
We want to be warm, patient moms—not angry ones. Yet the invisible load and constant pressures can overwhelm us, leading to "mom rage." Core Energetics, a mind-body therapy, helps release stored stress and trauma through movement and emotional expression, reconnecting us to our true selves. Here’s how I use it to manage mom rage. [31.10.24.]
Mom rage shame
Society's expectations for mothers are unrealistic: we should possess endless patience, a perfect body, and a high-powered career while managing an invisible mental load of chores, appointments, and family responsibilities. This leads to exhaustion and resentment, and when we experience anger, we feel ashamed because we believe “this isn’t how a good mom acts.”
Amidst the juggling of motherhood, work, and household tasks—often without support—we’re told we should find fulfilment and happiness in it all while making it look effortless. This gap between expectations and reality causes stress, as not everyone bonds naturally or embodies the idealised image of a “good mother.” Unrealistic portrayals of motherhood ignore the daily struggles many face, leaving mothers feeling isolated and inadequate.
What is Core Energetics?
Core Energetics is a therapeutic approach that releases and channels blocked emotions (anger, sadness, stress, trauma) from our body so we can connect to our whole selves. By breaking free of old patterns we can heal, grow and feel more aliveness. Founded by John Pierrakos in the 1970s, he believes that:
"Our blocks to growth are often rooted in our fears, and by working with these energies, we can transform our lives."
The “core” in Core Energetics is the heart of authenticity. truth and integrity. By connecting to the real part of ourselves, we can connect with others in a deeper more honest way. Removing energetic blocks and making space for our life force lets us channel and reclaim the limitless and unstoppable part of ourselves.
Core Energetics explore three layers of our personality —the Mask, Lower Self, and Higher Self:
3 layers of our personality
The Mask is the social self we present to people. In motherhood, this can be trying to live up to “the perfect mother ideal” by showing a smiley happy and content image (even when struggling inside). By suppressing our real emotions (anger, frustration, resentment etc) they begin to grow and feel shameful. When the mask slips this can show itself as rants, anger outbursts or saying mean comments.
(2) The Lower Self: Raw repressed emotions
The Lower Self includes negative, shameful or critical impulses and feelings that we hide from others. This may be called our “shadow self.” It’s our hidden “unacceptable” emotions such as anger, guilt and envy that we keep secret. For example, a mother may feel inadequate as a mother and worker (if she’s given up her career), constantly comparing herself with others.
(3) The Higher Self: Authentic, compassionate self
The Higher Self represents our compassionate, empowered true selves and serves as the vital life force that fosters growth through positive emotions like love, wisdom, courage, and integrity. It manifests daily through creative expression, confidence, and joy, acknowledging anger as a catalyst for proactive communication and problem-solving.
How can Core Energetics help me release my motherhood anger?
Core Energetics offers a powerful framework for mothers to clear anger and reconnect with their true selves through a four-phase process. First, by penetrating the mask, mothers can identify and shed the unrealistic societal expectations that pressure them to be "perfect." Next, in transforming the lower self-phase, they confront repressed emotions like frustration and guilt, embracing honesty and courage to understand their feelings fully. This leads to focusing on the higher self, where mothers channel their emotions into self-expression and creativity, connecting to joy and fulfilment. Finally, through connecting to the universal life plan (or bigger vision), they recognise their interconnectedness with others (finding communities and networks for emotional support).
Daily practices (that are do-able)
short power walks/ self-massage/ stretching or yoga/ breathing exercises/ free-writing (journalling)/ dance/ chanting/ humming/ meditating/ free movement/ dance and tidy with kids
Discover healthy ways to channel mom rage —book a therapy session here