Anxiety: how to “let it be easy”
I wake up anxious and overwhelmed, often fighting against my feelings and pushing myself too hard. A friend's question—"What if you let it be easy?"—made me realize how much heaviness I add to each day. What if I could practice radical acceptance? Here’s how to make the shift.
Radical acceptance: allow this moment to be imperfect
After university, I worked a soul-crushing retail job—folding clothes, bagging items, and counting down the hours until my shift ended. I dreaded being "in the moment" because it was painfully boring. Anxiety crept in with thoughts like, “Why did I go to university for this?” and “When will I get a better job?” I believed that resisting my situation and beating myself up would force change, but it only made me miserable. Radical acceptance is about seeing reality for what it is without making it harder. I didn’t have to like my job, but I could have accepted it as a stepping stone.
Fast forward 15 years - as a mom to a one-year-old, I still struggle with radical acceptance. My mind races with comparisons: “Why am I so tired when other moms work full-time too?” Radically accepting what is, is making a conscious effort to connect with this moment. And this moment may bring up difficult feelings and wishing our situation was different. When we notice this we can move back into the moment (not avoiding and ignoring feelings).
When my one-year-old baby screams I have a range of emotions. At face value I am calm. However, below the surface, I’m anxious, angry, and annoyed (wishing I could escape). Managing anxiety and stress when you’re experiencing anxiety is tricky because you’re in the thick of it and believe every negative thought.
Instead, if I can acknowledge the stress and anxiety, being kind to myself (rather than critical: “why can’t I cope"?”), I can add lightness to his tantrums. Radical acceptance can also help to improve: emotional regulation, negative thoughts and compassion (rather than listening to my inner critic).
“Let it be easy” ideas
Limit Decision-Making: Reduce decision fatigue by simplifying choices, like meal prepping
Habit stack: Can you habit stack (add a new habit to a habit you already do so it’s less effort)
Done is better than perfect: Practice doing one thing a day you don’t want to do (challenging perfection)
✍️ Journal prompt: What can you do to “let it be easy” for yourself each day?
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